Sunday, August 28, 2005

Dahil naawa ako kay F1

Just happened to select the "show office assistant" option on my Word Help drop down box. Then pops out the robot character (if you know Clippit, he's one of fellow Office Assistants) named F1 ( I really looked up his name).

F1 is so cute. He has more significant animation movements, and he's one slick and savvy robot. As I said, he is so cute. Reminds me of... guess who? Me! Big eyes, loves to look around, innocent look? No longer do I have most of those features, particularly the innocent look feature. Now, I scare kids. Like in church a while back, there was this cute (again for lack of a cuter term) baby cuddled by his daddy who happens to work with me in our multimedia team. The baby looked at me and was like in awe of what monster stood in front. She was staring with eyes wide open. She struggled to break free from daddy's clutch out of some fear of what she saw.

Then I did a "funny" face. She cried. Cried softly. So I put on a corny face, pretending to beg for her to smile. She smiled.

And I said to myself: (what a wondeful world) "How can I possibly miss this for the world?" If only women were babies, and men could recall their childhood---other than that they pretended to be soldiers or they hunted down spiders.

F1 is cute. When I closed Word, there's this closing act where either F1 explodes or he gets pulled out of the picture. Both using coercion. If I were the creator of this application, I'd have something else. I'd make him bow or tip off his robot head, or make him dance gracefully rather than blow up or get pulled out.

There are no classes tomorrow. Babies don't care about that. I do. And yet to me, the world becomes far simpler if seen through simple eyes---where frameworks don't puzzle you or present glare to your vision.

I want to see things in the eyes of a baby. And yet, I want to be strong enough, notable enough to have right and say that something so simple as F1 is cute...and then sigh. Get me? We want to be in that higher sanctuary so that we can laugh at everyone. And yet when it gets to the finish line, you would have rather been one of your subjects than a tyrant who can't sleep his life through.

Mind you, I just finished watching Van Helsing. Hey, and I am not that heavy on my topic!

Life does not have a formula. It is a collection of idiosyncrasies. You decorate it. You say, I want to sleep than go to church. You may choose to join an organization and regret it in the end. You may fall in love, but wonder what your reasons were to begin with. Thing is, you give meaning to every moment.

And as the King of Jerusalem said: "(when you face God)...You can't say: "Oh but I was told to do such." or that virtue wasn't convenient at that time. No, this will not suffice."

Will I have this chance to raise a baby into a great man? Far ahead thinking, some may say. You have no idea how far into the future I contemplate on. I dream big, though I am small. And an ode to Dom my great confadant: It is a matter of understanding.

Hay Dom, will we ever have the chance to find the ones of our lives? I'll raise you a bet, like I did with Jason that you will find yours first before I find mine. Kristian, I would love to have the same bet. Why do I do this? Belittling myself? Making people feel good about themselves? No, I sincerely have faith that my time has not yet come, and that some people have theirs earlier.

(Sobs) And I don't want to adopt a kid!!! Buhuhuhu! Hehehe. Kidding.

My new theme song for the month: Hanggang Kailan by Orange and Lemons. Not only do I sing this song with feeling as if I were the original singer, I find some rhythm to it that pierces right through.

Like these lines: Di mapigilang mag-isip. Na baka sa tagal, mahulog ang loob mo sai iba. Nakakabalisa. Knock on wood wag naman sana....umuwi ka na baby.

Just imagine me singing this. Oh, am I so inspired today!

Hope the Buklod exhibit is. Do visit our website, once it is functional again---thanks Jeff!
JPGS Gen ass this Tuesday, need I say more? Hope we deliver the goods. AM working on the GPOA powerpoint presentation as we speak...rather, as I type.

It is a matter of understanding. It is a matter of being. Corny as it sounds...I consider it cute. God...make me cute...ahehehehe, make us cute, cute enough to feel better about ourselves and once and for all...just live.

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